Thursday, December 4, 2014

And the Scales Fell From My Eyes...

Although my life is often described as minimalist, I relish my creature comforts in a way that only another former Alaskan homestead child could understand. Hot showers may be a standard, unsung feature to some, but to me they are luxuries of the highest order and I never take them for granted, while taking them at least once a day. Without one, I feel like a leper, crying "Unclean! Unclean!" when I venture outside my apartment.

Sponge baths simply aren't an acceptable substitute.

My last shower was on Monday morning; today is Thursday. My hair is unwashed and I feel hideous. To complete this charming picture, I haven't worn my usual eye makeup for four days. Even in the days of my misspent youth, when I dabbled in the counterculture, I still wore eye makeup.

Tomorrow I will be permitted to shower. Today I'm going to have a quick hot bath. I think a turban look is what I'll be going for afterward, swathing my unwashed hair in a colorful scarf. And sunglasses--rose-colored lenses from Bangkok street markets--have proven to be my best friends.

This is the aftermath of cataract removal, along with the inability to read small print at a comfortable distance. For the past decade, I've seen friends resort to reading glasses and felt grateful that I didn't need them. Now--hello, Eyebobs. No, I will not wear them on a little chain around my neck.

This would be much more annoying if I hadn't been given an overriding preoccupation--eyedrops four times a day. For real fun, I can't imagine anything lower on any sort of scale.

And yet colors are brighter, lines are sharper, and street signs are intelligible at a distance. I suppose it's time to stop being a curmudgeonly old harridan and give proper thanks to modern medicine.

Okay. The American Way of Physician's Care has finally justified its existence--but I still think overall it sucks. Maybe I'll feel differently with clean hair but somehow I doubt it.


Katia said...

You are so funny (even though you're probably not looking to be, at the moment). My eyesight has been slowly deteriorating, even though, like you, it comes later than for most people. I only need glasses to read, and I have also been resisting the chain around the neck thing, so often don't have them around where and when I need them. Good thing I have long arms :) It's still early after your surgery. And I think you'll feel better once you can wear eye make-up again (wonder, I do not believe I have worn eye make-up in ages, a bit of mascara once in a blue moon, my daughter has began stealing make-up forgotten in a pocket on the bathroom door and not used in years) and have a proper, long shower.

Amanda said...

There will be a silver lining Janet, nothing a hot shower and clean hair won't fix. Reading glasses add to the air of intellectual that you already have and they come in such lovely shapes and sizes now. Enjoy the colours and the lines and stop being so grumpy!!!!

Sherry said...

Wonderful You.
Like I told you, I'm now wearing real glasses and it ain't so bad. Without wearing them around my neck, I wind up spending a lot of steps backtracking to where I last left them. Small house, not much problem.. but I'm thinking of putting one of my beaded "glass keepers" back around my neck anyway. Wear your badges proudly. They have been earned. We should be proud not cowed.
And the last time I wore make-up I found I had forgotten how to put it on properly.
Oh my! City Mouse/Country Mouse.

Janet Brown said...

Thanks, Katia! I was trying to be funny, although truthful too. My first day was so euphoric, I was bound to come down a tiny bit. And if I looked like you, I wouldn't wear any makeup either!

Janet Brown said...

Amanda, you are such a Brit! Chin up and stiff upper lip!

Janet Brown said...

I wear my wrinkles proudly, Sherry, but I detest wearing glasses of any kind.